179 - Exploring the Character Traits of Successful Coaches

Ever wonder what separates a good coach from a great coach? It's their character. 

In this episode, we're diving into the character traits that all effective coaches possess. From determination and resiliency to willingness, patience, and commitment, discover how developing these traits can set you up for success. 

I’ll also provide tips on how to identify your strongest characteristics, recognize areas where you may need support, and then make a deliberate decision to work on enhancing those character traits. 

Developing your character is a continuous process, so join me in this conversation and let's go through the journey together!

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Transcript

Preview:  Are you patient enough to work on marketing your business for a year, seriously? And then have it blossom into the business that you want. Are you patient enough to do marketing, to be on social media, even when you think it doesn't look like it's working like nobody's commenting and I'm saying do it anyway. Are you patient enough to learn and experiment with the technology that is needed for your business? Are you patient enough to try lots of approaches and marketing until you can master the marketing that works for your client?

Intro: Hello, I'm Debbie Shadid, the host of the Life Coach Business Building podcast. If you are ready to have more clients in your life coach business, then you're in the right spot. Each week I'm gonna teach you super simple strategies to grow your business without feeling overwhelmed and without spending money on paid ads. If that sounds interesting. Stick around and let's get started.

Today's podcast is about character, and I want to start the podcast by telling you a funny story about me. I am being challenged today because we have contractors here doing work and it has been very difficult to record this podcast. I've taken probably eight tries, sometimes almost all the way completely through, and there's just been too much noise in the background. So here I am, I am going to practice the character that I'm going to talk to you about. 

Today in this podcast, I'm going to talk about the character traits of the coaches that I work with who are able to create success in their business. So I think their character traits that you want to think about, do you have them? Do you need to improve them? And have you even thought about your character?

I know for me, one of the traits that I really am proud of is honesty, that I'm a truth teller and sometimes that's good. And sometimes that's bad, but I really take pride in telling my clients what I see as the truth about maybe what's going on in their business. So what are the character traits that you have that you use in your business? And then what are the character traits that you need to develop to be able to grow your coaching business?

Let's start with determination. My goodness, you got to be determined to do this. It's not as easy as you thought. And also, it's not as hard as you think it is. So you have to be determined to learn how to be in business. You have to be determined to learn the technology. You have to be determined to do all the things that you hope somebody else will just do for you. Sometimes I work with coaches who say, well, I'm just going to have somebody else sell this stuff, or I'm just going to have somebody else get my website up.

But the truth is, unless you do it yourself to start, it's not going to be done in a way that reflects your values and reflects you. So you have to be determined to find the answers to how to do things. You have to be determined enough and believe in yourself enough that you're willing to invest in getting the help that you need.

I hear it time and time again on consultation calls where people say, well, I already got certified. I already spent this much money. And it's like, and you don't have a business. I mean, it's disappointing that in the certification process, you might have been misled that it was going to be that easy to be in business and it's harder than you think. But if you want to be a coach, then you have to be determined to figure out how to be in business, despite what you hoped or planned would happen when you went to certification. 

So resiliency is the second thing I want to talk to you about. Are you resilient enough to stick to this even when it looks like it's not working? Are you resilient enough to ask for help again and again and again? Are you resilient enough to say to somebody who's teaching you something, wait, stop. I don't get what you're talking about. Are you resilient enough to make mistakes, to try again, to do some marketing for like a whole year, you guys, and then decide, you know what, this isn't getting me the results that I want. So I think I'm going to make a shift. 

One social media post, one newsletter, or a few months of newsletters is not enough. Are you resilient enough that you will stay on track? When you get constructive feedback, will you implement what you have learned? When somebody makes a suggestion to you, will you go ahead and do what they say without taking it personally? Are you resilient enough that when you get ghosted, when somebody says they're going to join, and they don't pay you, when you get a whole bunch of no's, when you get no consultations that you won't quit?

All right, the third trait let's talk about is willingness, the willingness to be rejected, the willingness to have somebody saying no, the willingness to ask for help, the willingness to feel disappointed that it's not working in the way you want, the willingness to celebrate yourself when it is working, the willingness to feel embarrassed like I don't know how to do social media and to ask for that kind of help ,the willingness to say, I don't know how to do a real, can you help me with that? The willingness to say, Oh, my gosh, I think I'm wrong about this. The willingness to tell a client that they should not work with you. 

Listen, I do that every week. I have consultation calls for a reason because I really want to make sure that I'm working with people that I can support. And if somebody else is working with another coach, then it's like, it's not the right time for us to work together. You get the best result by working with one business coach at one time. And focusing on what they have to tell you. 

So sometimes I say, no, it's not the right time. People are always surprised by that, but are you willing to say, you know what? I'm going to not offer you coaching today. And I'm going to trust that you're going to say, wow, that lady really has great character. She didn't try to sell me, even though I really wanted to buy. And I'm either going to hope she comes back to me someday, or she'll refer me. 

Are you willing to have people think that you're crazy for being a coach? Can you raise your hand if that's you? Yeah. You've left your corporate career. They're thinking you're nuts. You're near retirement. Why would you do something like this? You guys have heard the stories. Oh yeah. She's a life coach or, Oh, your little business that you're starting. Do you have a willingness to let people talk like that, to think that, and to just do it anyway? 

Are you willing to ask people to work with you? Are you willing to say, Hey, let's have a conversation. Hey, I can help you. Hey, could I have your email address? Like there has to be a lot of willingness. Even if you think you're an introvert to put yourself out there over and over and over again, I want the willingness to go to a networking event and to walk into a room of people that you don't know and introduce yourself. Do you have that willingness? 

Okay let's talk about patience. Patience is another character strength that for sure you're going to either have to tap into or develop. You have to be patient enough to stick to the plan. You have to be patient enough to see this thing through. Are you patient enough to work on marketing your business for a year, seriously? And then have it blossom into the business that you want. 

Are you patient enough to do marketing, to be on social media, even when you think it doesn't look like it's working like nobody's commenting and I'm saying do it anyway. Are you patient enough to learn and experiment with the technology that is needed for your business?

Are you patient enough to try lots of approaches and marketing until you can master the marketing that works for your client? How about patience to stay consistent until your business produces the results that you've been working for? 

How about commitment? That's another character strength that is really being tested as you build your business. Commitment to your goal, whether it's a goal that's small that you're working to accomplish right now, or this long term vision that you're working on. Commitment to your niche, like you love your niche so much that you are willing to continue to refine your marketing message, to continue to figure out how to talk to him, continue to make offers until finally you make an offer that people say, Oh yeah. Yeah. I want to talk to that lady. That's the commitment that you have to your niche, to solving the problem.

Are you committed to your future clients? Are you committing to stay the course, to continue to build your business, to continue to spend money on the things that it takes to build a business? Because you're doing it for the future of the clients that are coming, right? Are you committed to the long term vision, the vision that you have for your clients, the vision that you have for the impact you're making in the world, the vision that you have for your business, but ultimately the vision that you just have for your life. We're all here to not only make a difference in the world, to live out our passion, But to also be able to create a lifestyle that allows us to do the things that we want in our lives. So get committed to those things. 

Now, let me talk briefly about how you can develop these character traits. And the first thing is to have some self awareness. Do you know what your character strengths are? Do you know what your character weaknesses are? I've talked to you about some of the ones that are keys to building a successful coaching business. But what character strengths do you want to tap into, do you want to emphasize in your business? 

One of my character's strengths is honesty. I think it's really important for me to be honest with clients, to be a truth teller about what's happening in your business, about how you should do your business. That is one of the things that I take great pride in. And I think that's a character strength that I really lean into. Can you identify what those are for you? 

All right. To develop your character, you have to have goals. There has to be something that you're attempting to get to. There has to be a benchmarker that you can measure. So I think having a goal that's realistic, in fact, as you're listening to this podcast and you think about the rest of the year, for some of you guys, your goal should be like maybe just to get your business launched, or maybe it's to have your first paying client or your first $5000 a month. 

It doesn't have to be to make a hundred thousand dollars or a million dollars. But what should those goals be? Some things that will help you develop character is if you have a short term goal that's really attainable, a medium goal. And then that goal, that's just huge that makes you become the next best version of yourself.

How about self discipline? You have to practice self discipline to develop your character. You have to have self control. You have to manage impulses and you have to manage the desire to get up and leave your office instead of doing what was on your calendar, instead of doing the social media, instead of writing the email, instead of following up with somebody, after a consultation.

You're going to have to reframe your thinking. So one of the ways to work on your character is to find the thoughts that are not supporting you and then work on finding some thoughts that can fuel you to develop better character. Positive affirmations are not exactly the answer because sometimes there's a negative thought underneath it, but find those thoughts that can reinforce the character traits that you want to develop. 

Assessing. You got to assess along the way to learn from what's happening. You have to figure out what are the negatives and positives. assess how willing were you this month to do this? How committed were you? If we take the five traits I just shared about, the willingness, the commitment, the patience, the resiliency, and determination, you could ask yourself that at the end of every month, like how willing, how determined, how resilient was I to do the things that were my goals, that were on my calendar, that were planned by me to do?

You have to seek feedback. You have to ask for help. You have to set routines in place and then follow the routine. Maybe you need accountability. The women in both my fast track and the VIP group, we have a small intimate group of women that I work with and we have Facebook groups. They give feedback to each other. It's so beautiful, honestly. They provide accountability. They ask each other for feedback. They help each other reframe negative thoughts. Maybe that's what you need to do. They provide that sort of safe place for people to come and build their business. So you have to learn from your setbacks. Setbacks are natural. I mean, they're going to happen, but how you show up in the face of those setbacks is what helps you develop your character.

You have to stay patient. Look, you got to be really patient to build a business. You got to wait for things to unfold and you've got to stay in belief because you're so committed to your niche, so committed to their problem, so committed to what it is you want for them. 

And the last thing I want to talk to you about, you guys, is to celebrate your success. Celebrate what you have accomplished, celebrate the things that you were able to do because you were willing, because you were determined, because you were committed. Celebrate the things that most people wouldn't think were celebration worthy like going live on your Facebook page or doing a reel or learning how to finally use Canva to its fullest. Celebrate the successes. 

Remember, developing your character is an ongoing journey. So I've just shared some ideas for your coaching business. I want you to take some time to think about your strongest characteristics, the places where you need some support, and then set yourself up for success by intentionally deciding to work on those characters.

All right, you guys have an amazing week. I will talk to you very soon. Bye bye.

Outro: Okay, ladies, that is it for today. Before we go, I want to invite you to head over to debbieshadid.com. I have this incredible Canva training, specifically designed for life coaches where I'm gonna teach you how to use Canva to create beautiful graphics to market your life coaching. All right. Have an amazing week. I'll talk to you very soon. Bye bye.