Ep 215 - Building a Business and Finding Self Love: A Client Conversation with Tabatha Estes

Episode 215 of the Life Coach Business Building Podcast

Do you have that little nasty voice that tells you negative things? Is it holding you back from building a thriving business and embracing self-love?

Join me in this episode where Tabitha Estes shares her journey of shifting from a traditional career to empowering others. She helps people break the cycle of feeling like they're not good enough and embrace their worthiness for a fulfilling, meaningful, and joyful life. 

Discover how she balances her adventurous RV lifestyle while building a thriving coaching business, thanks to the clarity and structure provided by the Business Building Boutique’s Fast Track program. 

Tabitha dives deep into common business struggles, such as overcoming societal expectations and always putting others first. She offers insights on flexibility, discipline, and commitment, finding clarity, balance, and fulfillment in both her business and personal life. 

Don't miss out on this inspiring conversation that will transform your journey to business-building and self-love!

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Transcript:

Preview: Writing the marketing message definitely brought clarity and, you know, was able to help me zone in on the people I'm looking to help and who I truly feel I can help make an impact in their life. and it's just, it's made the whole process as I've worked through the next, you know, steps afterwards easier because. Now I understand where I'm going. Like that was so foundational for me to get that marketing message nailed down and know my people and, you know, be able to, talk to the pain points that I'd experienced. In a clear and concise manner. 

Intro: Hello, I'm Debbie Shadid, the host of the Life Coach Business Building podcast. If you are ready to have more clients in your life coach business, then you're in the right spot. Each week I'm gonna teach you super simple strategies to grow your business without feeling overwhelmed and without spending money on paid ads. If that sounds interesting. Stick around and let's get started.

Debbie: Welcome to today's podcast. I am excited today to introduce you to Tabatha she is one of our clients in the fast track. And I want to share some about her coaching, who she coaches, what she's up to also her growth, her journey here, kind of what she's doing in the fast track and anything else that comes up. So Tabatha, will you introduce yourself to us? 

Tabatha: Absolutely, Debbie. Thank you for having me here today. My name is Tabatha Estes. I am a self-love coach. I help people in the cycle of feeling like they're not good enough and embracing their worthiness that they can have a fulfilling, meaningful and joyful life.

Debbie: Sounds amazing. Self love coach Who doesn't want to have a more joyful and meaningful life? you know, what comes to mind right now is that, I don't want to say as women, I can only identify as women, as I talk about this, but it's like, we're just running, racing. It's hard to be joyful when you're on a sprint every day of your whole life. I mean, is that kind of what you experienced? 

Tabatha: It is. I was always, you know, trying to meet everybody else's expectations for my life. And, I forgot that I have a voice too. It is my life and I get a say in how I want to experience it. And, it's been very empowering to have that realization and take back my control and the authority in my own life. 

Debbie: So a woman who comes to work with you, like what's happening in her life and what is she maybe thinking, I don't know, that she's not even actually aware of that you would help her with. So I know I might be catching you off guard, but if you can talk about that to somebody who's listening, you're like, you are this kind of woman. Where's she at? 

Tabatha: So one thing that comes to mind is, She's tired. She never has time to herself. She's always saying yes to everybody else because she doesn't want to disappoint anybody else. She's looking for that acceptance and approval. She's always putting her own needs below everybody else's. She's trying to live up to our societal standards of what is accepted as far as her body, the image that she portrays, can she keep the house clean and manage the things and take care of, you know, her responsibilities while working. And she just never has time for herself because she's chasing all of these expectations that she's seeing on social media and the news and just life in general. 

Debbie: So I expect that this must have been your story because we kind of all coach around the things that are, you know, our story that we've had transformation from. So what brought you to coaching then? 

Tabatha: What brought me to coaching was weight loss. I was, In the process of losing weight. a friend of mine said, Hey, have you checked out this podcast? And, it was a life coach. And so I checked her podcast out and went looking at other ones. And lo and behold, I found three life coaches at once that led me to the life coach school, which is where I ended up getting certified. The transformation that I received from doing the self coaching and working with a life coach that gave me the relief I never found when I would go to a therapist or, you know, reading self help book after self help book, trying to, be able to fit in and juggle everything that I felt was expected of myself. That's what led me to life coaching and the relief that I found for myself. 

Debbie: So you decided to pursue this as a career, and I assume that you had a career when you decided to do this. 

Tabatha: Yes. I've always wanted to help people and I had come to a crossroads in my career where the team I was on was its lifetime coming to an end. And I had an opportunity to either join another team or make a change. And, I really just had this calling to help people and I wanted to help them. You know, have a better life, find more fulfillment and I sat there and I debated, do I go back to school to become a therapist or, you know, do I invest in getting certified as a life coach and ultimately life coaching one out? Because that's where I had the most value added to my life and I wanted to offer that to others. 

Debbie: We were just in our coaching this morning, talking about therapists and life coaches. And this particular client was saying to me, she's a relationship coach. And she was saying to me, sometimes people say, well, I've been to therapy. And she goes, I just don't know how to answer that. And I said, well, let me just ask you, could you have become a therapist? Or a life coach. And she goes, well, yeah. And I said, well, then tell me why you didn't become a therapist. And it's kind of probably like you might have felt, which is like therapy was good for a time, but then it was like, I wasn't moving forward. And coaching was the forward movement that I was really looking for at that point. Is that kind of what your story is? 

Tabatha: Yes, absolutely. That's very much so what my story was. 

Debbie: It's so interesting because the light bulb moment that she had when she was like, you're right. I could have chosen therapy, but because of what I know, I chose life coaching. And so in her mind, it made therapy and life coaching equally the same, both really powerful. Things to do. So anyway, it was a fun conversation. Everybody in the coaching call was like, wow, okay, see this. We're equal to them. It's the rest of the world that doesn't know all of the amazingness that we bring to people's lives.

And that is what we do through building your businesses, helping you communicate better and such. So you decided to pursue coaching instead of re-upping in a new career. Tell me about the support that you were seeking when you connected with me. 

Tabatha: So I had been working on my business for about 18 months when I decided to come join you and the challenges I was having was I had a list of things to do. But I didn't know the appropriate order. And so I would work on something for a little bit, I'd get frustrated or I'd get stuck and then I jumped to something else or I started, you know, thinking that it wasn't working so that I'd go seeking something else. when I found you and the BBB, it was what I was looking for I was looking for step by step do this do this do this and watch it build on itself instead of bouncing around all over the place like I'd been I was looking for the structure and that is definitely what I have found with Fast Track.  

Debbie: One of the things that, um, is one of the first big steps that we work on is writing your marketing message. So do you want to talk about the kind of transformation that you felt from writing your message? I assume that you did feel like it transformed your business. Do you want to share about that? 

Tabatha: Absolutely. Yes, it did transform my business because I felt like I was all over the place with my social media posting. I mean, there was a theme, but it was still, it wasn't concise. It wasn't, wasn't clear and writing the marketing message definitely brought clarity and, you know, was able to help me zone in on the people I'm looking to help and who I truly feel I can, help make an impact in their life. and it's just, it's made the whole process as I've worked through the next, you know, steps afterwards easier because.

Now I understand where I'm going. Like that was so fundamental for me to get that marketing message nailed down and know my people and, you know, be able to, talk to the pain points that I'd experienced. In a clear and concise manner. 

Debbie: Yeah. And you actually were thinking, or were torn between being a weight loss coach or what you landed on. So do you want to talk about that too? 

Tabatha: So I spent the year prior to coming to work with you, trying to market myself as a weight loss coach, but, looking back at. You know, the social media content that I was, I was putting out at that time, I was dodging around the whole weight loss thing.

I felt that I needed to market myself as a weight loss coach because I have advanced certification as a weight loss coach and I've had success as a, in my weight loss, ultimately that isn't what rang true for me. That wasn't what I wanted to spend my time helping people with this year being able to be honest with myself and giving myself permission to just drop the need to use that certification at that level as a weight loss coach has been great improvement as far as my progress. I feel more at ease to sit down and work on my business because I'm not constantly battling between the thoughts of, I should be doing it this way. I should be marketing as a weight loss coach when I truly want to help people improve their relationship with themselves and just love themselves more so that they can improve their life.

Debbie: Yeah, and a side effect of that sometimes is weight loss, right? Absolutely. Absolutely. Yes, they're really you get to do also what it is you spent the extra time and an investment in doing. I want to also mention that on our day that we wrote your copy, which, by the way. Tabatha was probably, I don't know if I hire a copywriter, it might be her because she came and wrote the best copy.

We normally have a full day session where we review copy. And it was like, every time she showed her little section of copy that we were working on, It was written perfectly. So it was like, okay, we don't need to make any changes on that. And the other thing that we do during that day is we review your business brand. And I have to say as well, your business brand that you created in Canva was beautifully done. So super fun, kind of way to pull all your business together. How do you feel about your brand? 

Tabatha: I love my brand. I kept hearing you need a brand and I couldn't figure it out and there was that was just so easy and so fun when I finally sat down and walked through those initial steps after joining. I’m excited about how that all all came together and then leading into writing that copy. 

Debbie: Those two pieces together, when you have those done, it makes the other marketing that you're going to do much easier, right? Because you can use your branding and your messaging on practically everything you do.

Tabatha: Yes. It has definitely made things easier. 

Debbie: So we're going to, of course, leave how people can find you. But if people want to get in contact with you and hear from you on a regular basis, And maybe come to some future workshops, potentially have a consultation call with you, or look, I say, like, just grab a cup of coffee and have a zoom connection with you. How do they do that? Where do they find you? Let's have people check you out to 

Tabatha: The easiest place to find me is on Instagram right now, @tabatha_estes_coaching. That's where I'm most active at the moment. There is a link there on my page that you can get into find my email list and connect there as well and receive monthly emails from me.

Debbie: Yeah. That's awesome. Well, we will make sure we do that too. So I also want to talk to you about something that I found really inspiring, which is, the journey that you and your husband decided to take, in your life. I don't know the exact timing of it, but you're doing something that I know a lot of people wish, talk about, hope, and dream about but they don't do it. So you want to share about that? 

Tabatha: Absolutely. So it's been a little over two and a half years ago, my husband and I embarked on a journey of being full time RV travelers and we travel full time in our fifth wheel toy hauler, with our two motorcycles and, him and I both work from the RV, doing our coaching thing seeing the country.

I've seen things that I never imagined I would see in my lifetime. If it wasn't for the journey I've taken myself with coaches, and doing myself coaching, I don't think I would have ever jumped and gone on this journey, going back to. Living up to expectations that are set upon you.

There were a lot of family members and friends that really questioned when my husband and I said that, you know, we were walking away from our careers and going to sell our house and go travel. And even, even today, we still have. People that'll ask, aren't you ready to settle down? And, ultimately the answer is no, we don't know when we're going to, to settle back down.

We're enjoying the travel, enjoying the people we meet, you know, figuring out business on the road. I realized that the Internet can be challenging, but then I remember when I get on calls with other people and they're having internet connections and they're in a traditional home that internet problems are just what internet problems are. You just pivot and move on with your day. 

Debbie: What an interesting opportunity to basically be able to almost start over. I mean, I'm sure you have some things in storage, but what a nice thing to be able to look at everything you have and say, like, keep or go. And like, I would love that process actually to just kind of like, this stuff doesn't mean that much to me, the experiences that you guys are going to have in your life is what means the most to you right now I assume.

Tabatha: Yes, absolutely. Pictures, it's not like we can collect all these little trinkets and stuff as we travel so we collect pictures and stickers. 

Debbie: I love that. That's collecting memories. So I'm curious, how do you work while you're traveling? And you mentioned the internet. So I'm sure that you will find a place where you can get that solved, but how are you not working night and day when your office, what you're sitting in, Is in your RV. How are you working on the road and actually building a business? How does that work? 

Tabatha: It takes discipline and commitment. Initially, it was easier to just walk away from working when things would get really frustrating. Over time, it has become easier to be more disciplined. And one of the things that helped us is we try to stay in every location at least a week, if not two weeks, just to give us time to find the balance between the hours we need for working on our businesses.

And the hours we want to go and explore and experience the area we're in, it's been a learning curve. And, you know, the first 18 months I think that's where we really cut our teeth on figuring out what was going to work and what wasn't. Because when we first started out, we'd stay someplace two, three days and then pack everything up and travel again.

That was exhausting. Like we saw so much, but it was exhausting. And it really, you know, Left no time to focus on a business and growing. so, you know, we decided that it was okay to slow down and that we were still going to be able to see everything we wanted to see because we don't have a time limit on when we're going to stop traveling.

Debbie: I love that. So, coming to work with us, would you tell me how that has actually helped you in this situation, being able to grow your business? And I act like you want to grow your business. You have a business. You're just expanding the current business that you have. So how has what we have done with you helped you in your situation, 

Tabatha: It's helped me structure my days better. When I sit down to plan out my week, you know, I know when my calls are, I have an idea of how much time I will spend on whatever step I'm currently working on, and then, one thing my husband and I like to do is ride motorcycles. So I can look at my schedule and the calls and go, okay, I'm going to give up my Saturday off.

And instead take it off on Wednesday because I don't have any calls and the weather is going to be nicer on Wednesday versus Saturday. So I have the flexibility, but I also have the discipline and commitment. The structure is really what I was looking for when I came to BBB. 

Debbie: I’m so excited about spending time with you and figuring out how we're going to maximize your networking in every single location you are so that you literally have sprinkled clients all over the United States in every place that you have been.

Are you talking to people? I mean, I know, again, this is like, gotta learn how to do this. You're clear on your message. And that has only been in the last two months. So I know this is kind of all new, but do you talk to people about your coaching when you're at this place in the next place in the next place?

Tabatha: I do. When people ask, what do you do? You know, the first question we usually get asked after they tell us we're too young to be doing this is, well, do you work? Are you retired? No, we work. And then the next question is, what do you do? So when that opens up, that's when, you know, I have the opportunity to share with them what I do and have the conversation with how that all works.

Debbie: I'm sure there are a lot of follow up questions that come after that for sure. I'm thinking of, again, all the women that need to be talking to you about doing this. in their own life. So can you share, you talked about the progress that you've made as far as maybe being able to have some structure kind of to recap, you've written your website copy, you've worked on your branding. Is there any kind of place that you see you're going as a result of our program so far? Again, you're only two months into the six months or seven months that we have together. 

Tabatha: I'm excited to get my website up. I'm working on that now that I have the copy written. I'm excited to go into that next area, growing my email list, finding more people to connect with that. I don't have to be in person with and that may or may not be on social media. I see workshops coming up in the near future, that I thought with, you know, I would dream about, you know, maybe someday I'll be able to do these workshops while I think someday is going to happen sooner than I imagined when I would think about it back in January.

Debbie: And I love the idea of the workshops again for you, because when you say to a woman about self love. There's a high chance that in their mind, that primitive brain that you and I've learned so much about is like, wah, wah, wah, it's not even listening to what you said. And it's like, I don't need a manicure and who has time for, you're like, listen, come to my workshop and let me explain to you what this is really all about and the transformation that comes from doing this work. That's why the workshops will be so fun.

The self coaching you and I talked about, your clients will learn from you, not only from the coaching they receive from you, but also to learn how to coach themselves, we talked before we got on here, like that is priceless. The amount of coaching that we can do on ourselves. And take it with us anywhere we go.

Tabatha: Yeah, that's an invaluable skill to learn. I've heard it said we should be taught this when we're much younger and it shouldn't be something that, like me I stumbled upon in a podcast, I mean, it should be available to more people. 

Debbie: Yeah, I mean, listen, you teach one woman how to do this. And if you're listening, you don't know how to self coach. Tabatha needs to teach you because that's the difference between you can be coached by a coach, but also to learn how to self coach. That is like next level gold. And if you don't know that. You have control of your destiny when you can coach yourself, you can really think of anything that you want to be able to conquer and nearly be able to do it every time because you have the ability to work out what's going on in your head. And that's always what holds us back every time. We think it's all the other things and all the other people and it's really only us. So, tell me how somebody could work with you and what you guys might be doing together. 

Tabatha: So, I offer one-on-one coaching. I create an environment where it's just open and comfortable for people to come and, you know, share what they need to share. And we work through what's holding them back. What's frustrating them like you said, the thoughts are keeping them from what they think is moving forward. You know, sometimes, we think it's 1 thing when it's, It's really not, but I can offer a different perspective. and some ideas on making forward progress and, one of the greatest tools that I've learned is, managing how I talk to myself and just having hard boundaries on things that I just, I'm not allowed to say to myself anymore. That's self love, talking to yourself from love. Instead of talking down to yourself, the things that we say to ourselves in our mind, if it's not something you would say in front of a small child, you probably shouldn't be saying it to yourself. 

Debbie: So just tell me what that looks like. When I would walk by a mirror and I'd be like, Oh, you look so fat. What are you talking about? Give me an example. 

Tabatha: That is an example. Another one is, you know, you make a mistake and you sit there and, you know, you tell yourself you're stupid. You're never going to figure this out. Like that's not how you would talk to your friend if they had made a mistake. So why are you talking to yourself that way? 

Debbie: Yeah. Such freedom in that. All right. Before we wrap up. If you were going to talk to somebody on behalf of us about why somebody should come work with us, what would you say? 

Tabatha: Don't hesitate if you find that you're needing that structure and you just, you know, are constantly spinning on, where do I start? I don't know where to go. Tech is hard. Oh my goodness. The level of tech support that you all offer with NBB is just mind blowing. I really didn't understand. That when I signed up and it has blown my mind, the amount of support that you offer and so many times. That has been what has held me up as I get past that one little tech thing to be able to continue making progress. 

Debbie: Well, I know, you can probably speak to this too. What happens is we've already bought coaching and we've already been in a group setting, which maybe you would speak to both of those things as we finalize our conversation. They've already spent money and you're saying like. I should know what to do. I've already worked with somebody else and you're kind of beating yourself up over things like It works for other people. It should work for me. so, yeah, do you want to speak about that? And then people say, I don't want a group, I just need you to help me.

And we always say our group coaching is the best thing. Do you want to talk about that? I don't even know how you're going to answer this. So tell me what you think. 

Tabatha: I was hesitant about the group. Also, I have worked with a couple of other business coaches and, you know, I learned things, but they were still at a level that I wasn't ready for. So I would spin in confusion and get stuck with the tech. But what I would say about the group is. I have learned so much more being in the group than I think I would have had I gone with a one on one business coach. Because even though it's a question I may not think I have at the moment, I still come to the calls and I still learn.

And it amazes me how much you are able to remember each and every one of our, you know, brands and our niches and all of that, and still are able to keep us all separate. And, you know, it's amazing. I feel like you're just as invested in my business as I am at this point. 

Debbie: I feel that way. I mean, you know, I could use the word partner with you. And sometimes I do. But again, people just are worried about investing in one more thing. So thank you for sharing that. I think our group process is amazing because I think when I answer somebody else's question, a light bulb goes off in your mind. You're like, geez, I didn't think of that. Like you would have, we wouldn't have even discussed it in private coaching. Because now it's inspired by something that feels possible to you. 

So anyway, it's an honor to have you as a client. We met a year ago, more than a year ago at an event and sat at the same table. And so, when she came to coaching, I was like, don't I know you from something? She's like, yeah, we set it at the table. I'm like, oh boy. So, you just never know. in your life and in your business as a coach building a business. I met her a year ago.

I'm sure I said, Hey, here's my card. I would love to work with you. But I didn't hound her. I don't even know what she did to follow up with me. I know that one of her best, girlfriend buddies has just come to work with us. Thank you for that. And she came to work with us and I also met her at that same event and she said, I kept your business card on my night table for all this time.

So sometimes a journey to a client is so much further, so much longer than what you think. It's just interesting. So I'm just grateful that you didn't forget about us and that you've given me an opportunity to help you. I really sincerely appreciate it. All right. We're going to leave your website, get on her list.

Make sure you connect with her. If you've got that little nasty voice that tells you negative things, if you want to live a much bigger, amazing life, if you're interested, maybe in this travel thing, Tabatha can help you with all of those things. So anyway, thanks again. Have an amazing day, you guys. We'll see you very soon. Bye bye.

Outro: Okay, ladies, that is it for today. Before we go, I want to invite you to head over to debbieshadid.com. I have this incredible Canva training, specifically designed for life coaches where I'm gonna teach you how to use Canva to create beautiful graphics to market your life coaching. All right. Have an amazing week. I'll talk to you very soon. Bye bye.